so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
