you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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