Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
