READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
