My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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