So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
