2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
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