I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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