You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
she peed on how many people?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
