They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
