So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
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