HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
