she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize