Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
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