I want to walk on stilts...naked
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
