Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
