I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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