If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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