I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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