you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
