so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
