Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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