I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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