Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize