I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
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Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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