i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
