just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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