Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
