did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
