Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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