I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
