are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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