I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
