Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
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