I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
