maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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