I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
