How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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