O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Randomize
