You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize
