no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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