Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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