I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
