home. puking in laundry basket.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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