Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize
