got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
