u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
