He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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