I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.