in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize